Tag Archives: SELF LOVE

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Let’s talk about Hair…

“… Remember there’s a lesson 

In Every crevice 

Every curve 

Every dimple

Every scar

Every follicle

There’s a lesson in loving on yourself

Love the parts of you that you keep hidden behind the shadows…”

Press PLAY to hear episodes of Through the Eyes of NiSi: The Podcast

I’ve been on a hair journey for years. I’ve gone through styles and colors. One thing that is not consistent in my journey… is my hair. For years now, not many people have seen my hair in its natural state unless it was a short, relaxed style. I don’t think I consciously had a dislike for my hair, I just liked my hair better, in certain styles, with hair.

Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
My hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair
Not all my hair

This is a short glimpse of my hair journey, but one thing that is present in the majority of these photos is NOT my hair standing alone. I started doing my own hair, along with family and friends around the age of 16 I believe. So its been a long time, maybe since a child that I’ve gone for a long period of time just wearing my own hair in its natural state. Are you the same way? Do you feel pretty in all your natural glory? Why or why not? These are questions I’ve been contemplating over the last few weeks. In the past, I’d play in different styles and switch up with no problem but never with my own natural hair. It’s funny, I think of Tabitha Brown and her hair “Donna,” like what would my hair really say to me if she has been hidden all these years? What has she been saying? I think I’m starting to listen. Can you be around someone you like with no additional hair or makeup? Can you be around people you don’t know au naturale? Do you feel naked without it all? Why don’t we feel pretty as we are? What has society put in the air that makes us feel that we can’t (or won’t) stand on our own beauty? Because yes, it is a choice, yes it is your perogative what you do with your hair. I just want you to think about it, do you know you or your hair without adding to it?

This loc journey that I am embarking on is going to be hard. It’s been hard and I haven’t even had my appointment, just the decision alone has been tough for me. Feel free to join me, cheer me, share advice, etc.; I’m still working on not talking myself out of the appointment. As I am walking in this self reflection, how can I consider having a organization for young women to aid them in building their self confidence, but not accepting me as I am? I can’t name it ‘Lov’n Me,’ if I’m not. With all these self reflections, I’m taking the jump.

My hair

Interested in being a guest on the podcast? Click HERE to schedule a what day works best for you or feel free to email me at: info@NiSisEyes.com with the subject: Throu6gh the Eyes of NiSi: The Podcast

Click here to get your signed copy of Yonitry: Volume 1

(Volume 2 coming November 2022)

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The Ageless Woman

Click above to listen to The Ageless Woman episode or all episodes

Sign up for a free Spotify account so you can listen to the podcast, click HERE!

This week’s episode of Through the Eyes of NiSi: The Podcast, we speak to the amazing Theresa Flatts. I met Ms. Theresa through the ‘Curvy Doc,’ Ms. Janelle Simmons (click HERE to learn more about the Curvy Doc).

You never know who you will cross on your journey that may be an integral part of your path. By meeting Ms. Theresa and having genuine conversation, we got to talking about our purpose, our passion and here we are today with her putting the final touches on her event, “The Ageless Woman Women’s Empowerment Summit” with me providing spoken word for the event. The organization, The Ageless Woman has a primary purpose to educate, empower, mentor, share, and help build confidence by teaching women the 3Ps of Empowerment passion, power, and purpose.

I have many conversations with my sister, Tina. If you’ve been with me for a while, you know that we are like twins, ten years apart. Through our relationship; I have learned what things I may experience in my body, in my health, in relationships, etc. So by attending this women’s empowerment summit, it’s like having all of your sister’s, young and old, pour into you. By hearing these women’s stories and their journeys, take some of these gems and reflect.

As women, we hold so much in. We don’t let our voices be heard enough about what we’re going through on a daily basis. We put our big girl panties on and keep pushing through (and sometimes while being in pain mentally and/or physically). By attending this event, don’t just stop there; stay connected, don’t let the business cards you get, just sit in a wallet. Follow up and stay connected, that person could be your bridge to your next opportunity.

Here’s the links to everything we discussed:

7 Minutes

The Ageless Woman’s Summit

Let your Voice be Heard Podcast: Coming Soon

As most of you know, one of our own Queens, Ms. Cheslie Kryst died by suicide earlier this year. There was so much anxiety around her crossing the threshold into her 30s and what that meant for her career. She wrote an article in Allure magazine last year speaking candidly about her journey to her 30s. From watching to the Red Table Talk show with Cheslie’s family, one thing I gathered is to be kind to everyone because you don’t know what they’re dealing with behind closed doors. People can smile in your face and life can look amazing on social media, but until that person lets you into their world and their thoughts; you have no idea what is going on.

Read the article: A Pageant Queen Reflects on Turning 30

Red Table Talk: Miss USA Cheslie Kryst

Click here to pre-order to get your signed copy of Yonitry: Volume 1 (Deadline is 7/21/22 to be available for you at the summit).

Interested in being a guest on the podcast? Click HERE to schedule a what day works best for you or feel free to email me at: info@NiSisEyes.com with the subject: Through the Eyes of NiSi: The Podcast

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Self- Love Finale (June 2018)

24. List 24 things that make you smile…

My son, live music, great surprises, being in love, makeup artistry, food, seeing my client see their transformation, helping someone in need, modeling, comedy, accomplishing something, newborns discovering, people that underestimate me, seeing my family after a short/long time, my favorite artists in concert, when I receive reviews, when I receive referrals, seeing love, seeing my students perform and excel, a great massage, stress free vacation, fun times with my bestie, fun times with my sis, seeing my name tagged on great photos of clients and/or myself.

25.  My favorite quote is…

“Beauty awakens the soul to act!”  You see it on everything associated with my business  because I believe it to be true.  I doesn’t necessarily have to mean outwardly beauty, it could mean the inner beauty, the inner kindness that inner energy that exudes from person to person that travels.  When you feel that positivity or someone smiles at you and you instantly feel a little better, it helps someone else.  In my business and in life; when you look good, you feel good- wake up and make a change even if it is a small ripple effect.

26.  What does self love mean to you?

Self love means loving yourself enough to accept you with no makeup on, flaws and all.  Love yourself when you make mistakes or when you feel as if you are on top of your game.  Accept you when you are behind closed doors or in front of paparazzi and love yourself through it all.  

27.  What positive changes have happened in the last year?

I have become more open to risks, as scary as they are- I have taken a leap.  I have started working in my passion of being a full time makeup artist.  I am in my #journeytothecrown for Ms. Full Figured NC.   I am in transition of moving to Charlotte.  I am…

28.  I deserve happiness because…

I deserve it!  Why not?

29.  What are 5 things you are grateful for this week ?

I am grateful for family, life, a place to lay my head, employment, grace/mercy.

30.  How will you make next month a great month?

Continue to be migraine free, work towards my goals of becoming Ms. Full Figured NC (if you’d like to support my journey by donation and/or sponsorship, please click the link: https://www.gofundme.com/denises-journey-to-msffnc-crown).   I will be working within my platform, assisting young and mature ladies in becoming the best versions of themselves.  I will also be settling in Charlotte, NC and networking and making that my new home so any referrals , send them my way.

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Self- Love Continued…

16.  What do you look and feel like when you are most confident?

When I am most confident comes in 2 forms, one when I can sit and just be myself, flaws and all.  However, I am at my most confident when I have slayed my makeup, my waist is snatched and everything is in it’s place.  In those moments of my flaws and all, the insecurities can creep in, sometimes when you’re slayed, they can creep in but you have to know that you are beautiful no matter what and accept you in whatever version you are.  The one that’s a work in progress, which tends to be most often or in the moments where you feel like you are your absolute best.  Be confident and accept you for you, flaws and all, behind the foundation or not.  You are you by what’s in your heart.

17.  What is something you do better than your peers?

This is a hard one to answer.  I’d say patience and/or thinking before I speak.  There are a lot of things that I take my time with  or that I’m not quick to react on.  Sometimes that saves me and sometimes I should’ve said what’s on my heart.  However, depending on who is on the other side of it most likely changes if I need to sit and think a while first.  They say if ‘you think long, you think wrong’ but that gives me time to weigh pros and cons and and the many different scenarios that could come from it.  All in all, you have to do what is best for you, but sometimes the biggest last word is the one not said.

18.  Name 5 traits that make you a good person?

Patient, Friendly, Helpful, Nice, Loving 

19.  Free write [positive]

Blessings.  Sometimes you just have to stop and live.  This weekend was technically not the best time to go away for a weekend get away.    My life is changing, I am starting a new job on Monday in a new city and need to be getting some things in order (not to say that those things aren’t happening while I’m away).  But when life is constantly in your face, sometimes you need to step away and just breathe.  I have a lot that is changing and it can definitely be overwhelming and I am so blessed to have people in my life to help me step away from it or help me conquer it.  I am very thankful for all of the people that help me navigate life.  A lot of things are being thrown at me quickly and Im working on catching all of the fast balls but sometimes they are ground balls and I have to pick them up but nevertheless, I get to them and we find a way to not strike out if possible because we have people watching our back.    So as I sit in Daytona Beach with the beach in my backyard and the freewill to write this post and a few moments to not think about all of the things that I need to think about…it feels good to just enjoy the moment and the friendships and the family and the raindrops and the hot tub and the food and the sand and the talks and the breaths of fresh air.  I am not perfect and I am learning to be better at everything day by day.  I may not do everything the way that you’d like me to do it or vice versa, or I may not handle each situation the same way you would, we’re all different but just know that I’m doing my best to be the best version of me and continue to grow into a better version of me.  With my new role of working in my passion as a full time Makeup Artist, a may not have the time to get away like this again so I take this moment to just bask in the sunset.

20.  What do you want more of in your life?

I want more love, more travel, more freedom, more living.  We spend so much time living check to check or in between checks that we don’t have time or the freedom to experience all that this world has to offer.  We can’t just get away and live and sit by the beach, run your toes through the sand, try a new food…just experience something new.  When I say love, it doesn’t have to be in a relationship, that would be nice but even just friendships, loving life and the skin I’m in.  Every moment is not promised, live it up, take chances.  

21.  If you were a flower , what kind would you be?

Calla lily, these flowers are associated with purity, faith, youth, and rebirth.  I strive to walk in faith more and not scared faith.  Lately I’ve been working on trusting God more and just walking in faith.  The beauty of this flower and the meaning is truly what I strive for, to be elegant, full of inner and outer beauty, full of faith and purity.

22.  What would make your teenage self- proud of you now?

I think my teenage self would be proud that I have not strayed far from the person I was then.  I am a matured version of that same person with more morals, values and responsibilities.  You couldn’t look at me now and not recognize that person then… same ‘ol NiSi.

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My Challenge… My #JourneytotheCrown

So I’ve been given a challenge, feel free to take this journey of self-love with me. I’ll be combining two days into one for the sake of this post but here are the first two prompts and at the end, I’ll give you the others so that you can continue.
#1. What is your favorite personality trait?
#2. How many people do you think you’ve made smile in your lifetime?

So I’ll start with the first one, I believe that my favorite personality trait of myself is my patience. I am extremely patient and take my time with things. In some cases this can be a gift and a curse but in my field of being a teacher and a makeup artist, and just a person that works with people; you kind of have to be able to take your time with certain kinds of people. We’re all different and don’t all catch things at the same speed or even move at the same pace; but all in all sometimes we really do just need to slow down and just enjoy life. My students have even told me that I’m too patient and I need a Patience Award. LOL. That says a lot coming from some that drive it to the edge. As the singer Tweet would sing, “I was created for this…,” this is who I am.

In taking that time with people, you get to know people and in that time just maybe a smile is exchanged. And sometimes it’s not depending on the topic but maybe it’s in the hello or the goodbye. However, I’d hope that over a lifetime that I’ve made millions of people smile. From my days as a baby to performing as an actress, singer, model, and the many times I’ve held the mirror up to a client so they could see what I’ve been doing to their face. The smile that came after was always a good feeling in my heart. As a teacher, seeing my students accomplish something or even feeling the love that I hope that I exude on a daily basis shows on the smile and the goodbye waves and “I love you’s” as they leave my classroom (some for the last time this year).

I’m sure that many smiles have been exchanged from my face to others and hopefully it has helped to make someone’s day better or at least that moment. Whether someone smiles at you today, stop reading this right now….. go to the mirror…. and give your biggest Celie from The Color Purple smile (but don’t ever hide your smile and always love yourself first.
Feel free to comment and leave your thoughts.

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